Triple The Fun

What's up, Biggie?

"I think we're in trouble."

Oh shit, we have a basket. A basket with TWO adult sims, no one is carrying a baby.

"So, I had a litter of babies."

Fuck.

Welcome back to the Shithouse ISBI. Last chapter Jordan and Biggie had two children, one right after the other, perfectly normal. They decided to try for another one, keyword ONE.

Of course, Jordan has to be an overachiever.

Each baby got one rolled trait. And not one slob in the bunch! Glass half-full.  Hulk and Mt. Dew are boys, and Yoda is a girl. Three babies and two toddlers. I can smell the social worker already. Luckily for us,

"Are you fucking kidding me? I was sleeping!!"

Too damn bad.

 It's Pickle's birthday.

"Alright kid, when I say blow the damn candles out, I don't mean BLOW the candles. Quit flirting, and get this over with."

"You mad, Granny?"

Pre-makeover. She's now a technophobe.

"That tv is a piece of shit."

I don't think anyone is going to argue with you.

"We need to get rid of it."

That I think they'll argue with.

Can I get an "Oh HELL FUCKING NO!!!"?  Even if I were to consider the possibility, which right now I'm not, the house is full. No more sims until your mother buys the farm.

"But they're so cute!"

I DON'T CARE!!

"Alright fine! You don't have to yell."

Here's Pickle after her makeover.

"And THIS is a triangle!"

So glad those hours banging on the shape toy were well spent.

"I want to woohoo!"

I don't give a rat's ass. No woohoo!

"Why not?"

Biggie is busy.

"When's he going to be done?"

About 7 years from now.

"Wait, no woohoo?"

"That's right, Dad. Long, dry spell coming up."

Smart baby.

"Rawwwwrrderrrrpduuuhh Brains!!!"

"My love, my child, my PRECIOUS!!"

My sims have the weirdest eyes.

"You see nothing."

So it's right here that I finally installed Generations. I hadn't done it for the longest because the first time I tried to play with it, the scolding made me batty, so I shelved it until I could find and install a mod for it. I finally did that, along with one that eliminates imaginary friends, so here we are.

Jordan and Pickle beating the crap out of each other with pillows.

"Ok, ok, time out."

"PSYCHE! Just kidding!"

Adults are assholes when they play this game.

This, OTOH, is adorable.

"OH NO! It's gonna get you, Oscar!"

"Tickletickletickletickle!!"

"Oh my god! The fumes! I can't even open my eyes! Where is the tub?"

I'm surprised the service people still come to this shithole.

This is where having a technophobe pays off. There's nothing else fun for her to do other than read or play chess.

"And this is ................................. still a triangle!!"

Her brilliance is dazzling.

Yoda: "I can't breathe!!  HEELLLLPP!"

Hulk: "*cough* Dying *cough* stench *cough* killing *cough* me *cough*"

"Be quiet, boy baby!! I'm trying to sleep here!"

Baby girl: "Nobody cares, lady!  Feed me!!!"

"I do NOT like having three babies."

Kind of makes you nostalgic for the good ol' days of only two toddlers, huh?

"Grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr."

"WAAAHHHH!!!!"

What's the matter, Oscar?

"Picka mad?"

"Will you quit screaming?!!! I cannot believe I have to share a bedroom with two of you little turds!"

"Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz ahhhh, sibling rivalry, music to my ears zzzzzzzzzzzzzzZ"

"Make that three turds."

"Otay, Picka, I do somefing es."

"You do that."

"Wait a minute, is that the tv?"

"Now what is da matta wif her?"

"I HATE the tv!  Someone needs to turn that thing off right now!"

"You not da boss, sissy."

"I'm turning the tv off, you need to do something else, Oscar. Play with a toy that will actually teach you something instead of this mindsuck."

"Otay, otay."

"Ew NO! What is that ear-wrenching banging sound?"

"You know wheah you kin tuff dis mawwet, sissy?"

Oscar can't win for trying.

So I've noticed something. I don't know if it's a glitch, or if it happens in any house with a washer and dryer.

If Biggie's hygiene is low (yellow/red), it goes back into the green when he changes his clothes. I realized he hadn't bathed in at least several days, but wasn't in the red. All he has to do is change his clothes and he's back in the green.  I think this may be true of all of them. No one is bathing as much as they should, it seems they don't need to. I am starting to consider getting rid of the washer and dryer. As much fun as counting the piles of laundry is, I think we're a lot lower on pee fails because the bathroom is more available than it should be.  Hmmmm, I may wait and see what happens when the triplets become children, which won't be for a bit.

But y'all know what this means! No party. I'm legit nervous about aging up all three babies in roughly the same time period. So, starting in the morning with the most 'in the green' baby, we're doing this one little worm at a time.

"I am getting really tired of being woken up."

And by "we" I, of course, mean Bubbie. Let the games begin!

"If I'm going to fucking do this, the assfaces you call parents better get the hell out here and cheer!"

Hulk: "Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz"

It'll be a miracle if she gets through all three babies without peeing herself.

Looking good, Hulkie!

"Alright, whateverthehellyournameis, let's do this."

Mt. Dew: "Awesome! I'm so ready!"

"Oops, hold on kid."

"But, I wanna get big!!"

"Shit!"

Really? You couldn't make it past one caking?

"Shut your damn hole! This is all your fault!"

Believe me, I wish I could control who cakes the babies.

"You jinxed me!"

Yeah, I did.

"Someone wet their diaper, and it's not me."

Poor Dewie.

"Woohoo now?"

Go ahead, it'll drop out of your queue in a second anyway.

"Cool!"

"It kinda stinks in here."

Poor Dewie.

FTR, both boys have the hair they grew up in, I just recolored it. I love Dewie's 'do, so cute!

"This is it. This is how I die."

Oh give it up, you bloody drama queen!

Yoda gets to grow up outside, away from all the stench.

"And how fweakin' adowable am I?"

SO FREAKIN' ADORABLE!!  Ten approves. 

Enjoy the picture because it's the last you'll see of her looking this cute and green. Shortly after I took it.

I haven't had a crash in ages, not in this entire game thus far.  Stupid triplets! I had saved after Dewie's caking but before his makeover. So I made him over again, re-caked Yoda, annnnnnd

This time I'd saved after giving Dewie his makeover, so I had to cake Yoda again. That was uneventful, so I tried to give her a makeover when it crashed once more.  Fine you stupid game, you win. Yoda will go un-madeover until her child birthday.

"Dat's otay. I still cute!"

Yeah, I just wish you and Hulk didn't have the same haircut. 

I guess the game did not want this child green and adorable because I had no more problems with it after this.

The next week or so is a whirlwind of trying to keep all the babies reasonably happy, and Biggie from collapsing.

"FEEEEEEEED MEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!"

"Okay Yoda, chill out and I'll get you."

"Alright girlie, Granny's tired so you need to go to bed."

"Look lady, I'm not a girl, nor am I tired!"

"Night night!"

"HELP!! I tuck behine a mowtin of 'tink!!!"

Ask the flies for directions.

Even Sky helps out.

"You need attention, Dewie!"

"Oh god, who are you? Why am I cold?"

"Up you go!"

"Hahaaaaaaaasomebody'sgonnarescuemeright?"

Sorry, Dewie, nobody is rescuing you. She'll put you down eventually.

"I can feel the life draining out of me."

Damn, he is one pretty boy.

"I.Need.SLEEP!!"

Jordan's constantly being woken up by the babies. Biggie's schedule is all over the place. He sleeps whenever the babies are happy enough to be left for a bit. His energy bar is never higher than halfway full, and that's a good day. He hasn't touched his lifetime wish since the triplets were born, and forget them learning their skills.

The rest of Biggie's time is spent fetching wide awake toddlers from their cribs.

"Well, I'm exhausted. Time to put the babies to bed."

"One down, now for that pink haired one."

"*sigh* Down you go, Hulkie. Go play."

"Mommy's tired, Dewie. Time to go to bed!"

I can't even lock the doors because each bedroom has two cribs in it, and I can't lock anyone out of their bedroom.

"HEAR YE, HEAR YE! Gather 'round, peasants! The Queen has a declaration!"

"My castle is a pig sty! One of my servants needs to do some laundry, and clean these dishes. I cannot live in such filth!"

"Servants, I command you to clean up this mess!!"

Well kid, you're in luck, sort of. Biggie is a slob, so I never make him clean as I figure he doesn't care.

He may care more than I thought.

"Yeah, it's getting kind of bad in here. I probably should do something."

Hey, if you're going to wish for it.

And of course the washer breaks the first time he uses it.

Finally!! One less toddler in the house. And the game decides to give Bubbie a break.

She got a little too excited about it.

"Jeez, Bubbie, forget your Depends again?"

"Fuck off. I HATE birthdays!"

Oscar was fully skilled before the triplets were born, so he rolled "disciplined" for his trait.

Biggie is attempting to potty train the triplets so their toddlerhood isn't a complete failure.

"I wanna play!"

"Pee first, then play!"

"I not tyad, Granny!!"

"Daddy!!"

"Hi sweetie! Sorry your Grandmother is an idiot."

"I NOT SWEEPY!!"

"Wha happen, Daddy?"

"Your grandmother's ridiculous antics are making us glitch, Hulkie."

"Gwitch!!"

Every.Fucking.Day.

"That little brat needs to shut up! Why is one of those useless little lumps always screaming?"

"I don't like this house."

Everybody's happy!!

Sunny scrapes the bottom of the barrel.

But, alas, it was not meant to be. Good luck with that, Stacey.

"Who needs school when you can stand around on the pavement staring at nothing?"

"Come on, Hulkie! You can do it!"

"Ok, pink kid, now this is rated R but I think it's perfectly fine for you. It's a good lesson in when the killer is chasing you, do not run into the basement or upstairs."

"Good lord, why won't this child stop screaming! The movie is not that scary!"

Grandmother of the Year.

Awwww, Dewie's so cute!

"Okay, it won't let go now!"

SO CUTE!!

"When do I get to woohoo?"

About 5 more years, Jordan.

"I am not happy. I'm about to explode over here!"

"Can y'all peese na tawk abow dis while I in heah buffing mah teef?"

Sorry, Pickle.

Sunny's daughter, Jacqueline, aged up bald, so I clicked on her portrait and fixed her. I am pleased that Sky's freckles are being properly passed down.

"It's my birthday!!"

Hurry up, you're blocking the fridge.

"Birthday woohoo?"

No.

"This is your fault."

It probably is.

"Also, I want another baby."

You're crazy.

"Can't I even try? Risky woohoo?"

No

"You're mean. You weren't this mean when I lived in the asylum. What happened to you?"

Poor Jordan is an unfulfilled sim, in ever so many ways,

"Hey all! I got old!"

Pepto's here! Must be a birthday!

"Is it this one's birthday? Can I help her with the candles?"

It's Pickle's birthday, Pepto, and Dewie's a boy.

"Really? He might be the prettiest one in the house."

"I wanna go play!"

Poor Dewie. It's tough to be cute and popular.

"*snort* That's her, Rodolfo, right there on the couch. That's the crazy, mean girl I had a crush on in high school."

"Really? In outfits like that?"

"That's not at all like what she used to wear in high school.I gotta text my wife a picture, she'll crack right up!"

"Why is nobody cheering for my birthday?"

Everybody sucks, Pickle.

Everybody sucks pickle.

She's got the best name. Also, commas are important.

Did we get our feelings hurt?

"Um, no. I've got better things to do than hang around this dump. Later, bitches!"

So how does our darling Pickle look as a teen? Do the triplets bork up my game any more? Will Jordan ever get more woohoo? Find out next time.

Points

Every time you can roll a trait for a sim: +25 (15 for the triplets, 5 for Pickle, and 5 for Oscar)
Triplets born: +10
Pee Fails: -10

Previous Total: +108

Current Total: +133