We started off the last chapter with a birthday, however unplanned, so why not start this one out that way, too?
Sky threw Bubbie a small party at the house, just a few friends.
It's also PP's birthday. I think everyone flocked to Bubbie's cake because hers queued first.
And of course Taylor had to try to celebrate both birthdays before using the toilet. It worked out well for him, as you can see.
"The thanks I get for caring about my kids."
Bubbie got to roll her trait and she is now mean-spirited. Her LTW is gold digger. She's also our new torchholder, congrats Bubs!
"Yeah, fuck that. Can we move out of this shithole now?"
Sky's total LHPs, for the record.
PP also got to roll her trait and is now an evil, athletic party animal.
"I'm not even allowed to throw parties yet. Such bullshit."
I built a house on a different lot, slightly larger than this one.
I'm awesome at this, as you can tell.
Again, all one floor, two bedrooms this time, and a patio instead of a porch.
Looking in the front door.
Kitchen, complete with dirty dishes.
To the left of the kitchen, the living room. One of Bubbie's first wishes was to learn to paint, then join the painter career. She'll do that soon, she's got more important things to do first.
Little hallway that leads to the bathroom and bedrooms.
The bathroom. Not shown, the really basic tub.
Back of the house and patio.
So as our new torchholder, one of Bubbie's first goals is to snag herself a rich husband. Time to find out who's rich around here.
Morgan: "Nope, sorry. I live in the 'Humble Homestead'. I'm dirt poor, actually."
Next!!
Oh wait, someone's got to be a camera whore first.
I do appreciate you not hanging to dear life by your fingernails, Tay.
"Oh, is that what's happening?"
"Pop? Why are you all grey and see through?"
"I really want to woohoo, where the heck is my husband?"
Sky just got home from work.
"Eh, I'm good, Grim. At least I was spared an elderhood of languishing in NPC no-man's land. Three great kids and lots of woohoo is nothing to sneeze at."
"No sneezing. At all. You sims and your germs freak me the hell out."
"Aw MAN! Where is that weird thing with the antenna that is supposed to make me feel better?"
In the current torchholders
"Dammit!"
Alright, Tay's dead, very sad. Let's move on to more important matters, shall we?
"Hi, are you rich?"
"I sure am, gorgeous! What can I do for you?"
Rich and old?
Stop the timer, I think we have a winner.
"So nice of my husband to take the time to talk to that young lady. I'm sure he's giving her very good advice."
And married, as if that matters.
She never did call him "Dad". Looking back on her childhood, I can see her path to truly giving no fucks.
Bubbie was starving, so she and Jessie went out to dinner to work on their friendship. I think they made it to "friends" before separating for the night. Don't die yet, Jess, we've got big plans for you.
Oh Wanda, I almost feel sorry for you.
Sure, why not.
"There's nobody here."
A date at the Salon? Maybe she's dropping a hint.
"What?"
Nothing.
Wait, who the hell called a babysitter? And why? PP is more than old enough to be home alone.
"It wasn't me! I just went across the street!"
"You called for a babysitter?"
"No, but if you clean you can stay."
Yup, definitely a babysitter.
He got himself some soup, ate, got up, charged Sky $75, and left. Okay, I know we used a lot of babysitters in the past, but come on!
"Hi Jess, it's Bubbie.......................... Yeah, hi. Anyway, I had a great time last night. I'm going to go for a walk at the graveyard and I was wondering if you'd like to join me?......................... Great! I'll see you there."
"Thanks for meeting me, Jess. I really like that vest, it's a great color on you!"
"Why thank you! And your vest is very pretty on you. Actually, anything would be really pretty on you."
"I've been thinking about you since last night, Jess. I think you and I have a really special connection."
"I'm so glad you think so, too. You might be the most beautiful girl I've ever seen."
"There's just one problem."
"What's that?"
"Your wife. I don't think she's going to like us being together. I .................. I don't suppose you'd consider leaving her?"
"Of course I will! Wanda's okay, but she's got nothing on a pretty young thing like you!"
"Oh Jess, you're the best!!"
Then she overplayed her hand.
"Marry me, Jess!"
"Oh honey, no. It's way too soon!"
"Oh. Okay,
So she slept over at his house instead. I'm sure his wife doesn't mind.
"Zzzzzzzzzzzzzz I've got my warning sensors on. zzzzzzzzzzzzzZ"
And then proposed in his kitchen, in front of his wife. As you do.
"Is it Jessie's birthday? Why is this young lady giving him a present?"
I don't know if she's senile or was never terribly with it right out of the starting gate.
They had the kitchen quickie special since, let's face it, we don't have all day here.
This game's idea of "rich" cracks me up.
"Two thousand simoleons? That's it? THAT'S RICH? I went through all this bullshit and had to kiss some gross old dude for just $2,000??"
Hey, I don't make the rules. And you're going to have to do a lot more than kiss him later on today. We need an heir, preferably heirS.
"Oh jfc, I don't even want to talk about it!"
Here's the new guy's stats. Not even halfway on his lifebar, so we have plenty of time. He's unflirty? Damn, I'm surprised the light speed courtship went as well as it did.
"Oh god. Alright Bubbie, buckle down, you can do this. Jason Momoa, just keep thinking about Jason Momoa."
She survived and we even got a jingle on the first try.
"Thank fucking dog!!"
"I don't know, sweetie. I don't think the pool is a great place for a honeymoon. Are you sure you wouldn't rather go to France or Egypt?"
"Oh no, I hate flying. The pool will be just fine."
"Okay, as long as that's what you want."
So they got to the pool, and that's when I realized that not only can I not direct Jessie into a pool, but I also have no control over what the other sims on the lot do.
"And it appears that I can't 'call over' from in the pool, so can I get out now?"
Yeah, do what you want. I guess we're going to have to wait until he gets in on his own, and hope that no one else I give a fuck about is in the pool with him. And pray he doesn't flip me the bird and decide to go home.
"Can't you just give me Dexter Bear?"
I could, but it feels even more cheaty than this.
"Wuss."
I could also wait for him to die naturally, but that's always been very iffy for me in terms of the golddigger lifetime wish. Sometimes it fulfills and sometimes it doesn't. But if I off the sim soon after marrying them in, it always works. I'd rather not risk it.
"I'm totally fine with sooner as opposed to later."
I know you are.
Bubbie got out of the small pool and, thankfully, Jessie got in the big pool all on his own.
"*sigh* I'm MARRIED!!"
"But not for long! Ha ha HA!!"
Yup, that's the wall of doom behind her.
There were a few unfortunate souls trapped in the death pool with Jessie. You'll meet them soon but, needless to say, there was no one I cared about. My simself is there, she made the fateful choice to get in the small pool. Lucky her.
So now there's nothing left to do but wait.
"Ahhhhh, this is the life. Although, I'm hungry."
"Nothing like grilled dogs at the pool on such a beautiful day!"
It's kind of grey out.
"I'm not talking about the weather."
In a rather odd coincidence, Jessie's ex-wife Wanda was in the pool with him, and is the first to drown.
"It's my birthday bitch!! I don't know where you and that camera have been but right now it's all about ME!!"
Yeah no.
How's it going there, Jess? You dying yet?
"No, but I really need to pee."
Crud.
It really is a pretty night to die.
"Goodbye, cruel world........"
"What the HELL is this? Look, I love a good drowning as much as the next person, probably even more, but you're supposed to take the damn wall down BEFORE I get here! That's the deal!"
Sorry Grim, but our intended target hasn't died yet.
"Wait, there's more than one?"
Yup, possibly four.
"So, mass murder?"
Looks that way.
"YES! This is going to be a GREAT night!!"
See? Everybody's happy.
Next to go is Siddhartha Macon - Paparazzi
"But *gasp* I didn't *cough* get the money shot! *gurgle*"
This is what happens when you swim on the job. Meanwhile, on the other side of the wall........
"Please Grim, have mercy! My husband leaves me for a younger woman, and then he kills me all within 24 hours! Please don't let him get away with it!"
"Murder AND betrayal? This is the best shift I've worked since that time the meteor hit the school and all those kids died!!"
"Oh my god, this is SO fun! Can I get married again?"
About friggin' time, Jessie!
"I'm sorry, Wanda..."
Siddwhateverthefuck: "I'm ready to go, Grim."
"I should think so. You lot are so annoying, I can't believe you've survived this long."
My simself: "I feel like I've reached an all new Sims 3 low."
I don't know, you screwing your way through one of our legacy families that time was pretty embarrassing.
"For you maybe, I had a great time!"
"Fuck yeah!!"
"Soooooo, can I go now?"
Sure, whatever you want.
"Well Grim, I'm a complete fool and I guess I got what I deserve. I'm just sorry I brought my poor Wanda down with me. She deserved better."
"While true, you are partially responsible for one of the most enjoyable nights I've ever had. So while my powers are limited, if there's anything I can do...."
"Could you give Wanda her life back?"
"LOL! No."
"Oh. Well. May I stay here and haunt the pool?"
"Fine with me!"
Oh Jessie, we hardly knew ye. Enjoy haunting the pool. I'll try to bring your future children here to visit.
PP: "Does anyone know who died? I'm in a really shitty mood, I feel like someone died but I have no idea who."
Pepto: "You know, I kind of felt that way last night, but by the time I woke up, it was gone."
Bubbie: "No idea what either of you are talking about."
Yup, PP, immune to the effects of the moodlet manager, is mourning an old man she's never met, never knew existed. Sorry kid.
Bubbie joins the painter career.
Generation 3 is on its way. Per the rules, Bubbie got the fertility reward with her first 10,000 points. I'll also be having her watch the kids channel. I'd like twins so she doesn't have to find another baby daddy. She may anyway, we'll see, but it'd be nice to not feel like I have to.
"It's your birthday, Pepto. You are moving OUT! Don't think for ONE minute that you get to stay. This is MY house and I'm kicking your ass the hell OUT!!"
Even with her own room, she's still cranky.
"I can't wait. You couldn't pay me to stay here!"
"I wish to lead a really exciting life!"
Twallan came! I don't remember who the old lady is, some friend of Sky's most likely. Speaking of Sky, we haven't seen her since she aged up. Eh, she'll show up soon.
Pepto rolled his trait and is now a daredevil. His LTW is International Super Spy. I moved him out into a little home of his own. He's probably much happier.
"I thought I was supposed to follow Mom home, not the cops."
Me too, though you also got an anonymous babysitter call so you seem to be special.
"This sucks. Where is Mom anyway? I thought she'd come out and yell at me."
I think you're good.
We'll end this chapter with a weird glitch.
Very strange.
"I'll bet it's Jessie's life insurance policy!"
Okay, maybe. You're not keeping it.
"WHAT??"
I get points for money and I don't want to cheat.
"It's not cheating! I MARRIED AND FUCKED THAT OLD BASTARD!! I DESERVE THIS!!"
You can thank Pepto's dad.
"Sonofabitch!!!"
You can't buy anything with it anyway.
Next time, the third generation comes a-knockin'!
Points
TH achieves their LTW: +10 (Bubbie)
Anytime you roll a trait for a sim: +15 (Bubbie, PP, and Pepto
Every 50,000 in LHP your TH has when the torch is passed: +10
Pee Fail: -5 (Taylor)
I'm not counting Taylor's death as premature for points purposes. His death was a calculated part of the TH's lifetime wish, not a result of the ISBI aspect of the game.
Previous Score: +33
Current Score: +63
